First, my husband is the best, I cannot imagine being with another. I have about $30,000 of debt that I want to eradicate most of before I work on starting a family. I personally accrued this debt through college loans, credit cards and the like, and I%26#039;d like to get rid of at least the credit card debt before bringing a child into the world. My husband wants a child so bad and everytime he brings it up and I %26quot;dash%26quot; his hopes by giving every excuse why we should wait, he becomes withdrawn and sad. I think that he wants a child sooooo bad with me because he was inter-racially adopted and has never had the feeling of being %26quot;blood related%26quot; to anyone, or has always felt a sense of not belonging to his family. With him being in the military and my bad debts I just think we would be waaaay better off to wait 2 years while I pay off the debt, and then try for a baby. Because my fear is that putting the cart before the horse will lead to financial and possible relationship ruin. What do I say?
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
Just be honest and tell him what you said here, that you would like to get the debt cleared, that you want to wait for good reasons, because having a baby IS expensive. Tell him that you two can work together to plan a date to have the debt cleared, and therefore leaving you free to try for your little one. Reassure him that you do love him, and its not that you doubt his love of you, or your love for him that you want to delay.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
children are a blessing. why trivialize their place in your life by reducing them to a dollar figure in your budget? If it happens...it happens.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
Ok, try to get your bills consoildated if they are not already. That way you make one payment a month that will go towards you loans. Then see where you are with affording a baby. Make sure you talk to your husband and explain the idea, if you like it yourself.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
I understand your concerns, but if you wait until you are out of debt to have a child there will NEVER be a child. Unless of course you know of some miracle way to cure the problem. Sometimes debt correction takes a long time.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
As a mother with three children, I have to say, if you wait until you can %26quot;afford%26quot; one, you%26#039;ll NEVER have one. I feel that if you really love your husband, you have to consider his feelings too, as he IS in this relationship too. However, you are the one who has to go through the physical and emotional stuff, so you need to have a big say here as well. I say a compromise (just like always) is in order. Estimate a time when you will feel more comfortable. Say, instead of when the $ 30,000 debt is paid, make it that you%26#039;ll start trying for a baby when it%26#039;s $ 15,000. You could both get part time or weekend jobs to apply to the debt in the meantime to make it happen faster. You have to give a little, and he has to give a little. I hope you can come to some sort of middle ground. It sounds like everything else is where it should be in your relationship. Good luck.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
Just use birth control until the time is right...but remember, we can%26#039;t always pick the time, sometime it picks us...so don%26#039;t wait until it is too late...
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
I personaly feel if you are already in a finanical squeeze why bring a little one into your life that who knows might not be a healthy baby and there is bigger strain on your marriage life wallet...........Sometimes we need to have a organized life before bringing someone else into it.....I agree with you, even though I do not know you, I understand where you are coming from.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
I agree with you when you are that far into debt you shouldn%26#039;t choose to have a child. I know alot of people say that you shouldn%26#039;t put money over a child but I think putting a child into a bad financial situation is selfish. Set a goal and really work towards it. You and your husband should do this together. Then once you have reached that goal and you are both ready then go for it.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
Kids can be expensive. When you are spending your money on your children it can be hard to catch up on debt. And depending on how many children you have, you may have to buy another home, or a bigger car. WIth a poor credit score it makes it more expensive. Sometimes we can%26#039;t pick the timing though. It it%26#039;s meant to be it will happen.
My Husband wants a baby, but I know we%26#039;re not ready...?
You are being very responsible. You should bring down the debt before bringing a child into the world, to make sure that you can properly care for the baby. Explain it to him, tell him you want a baby, but you want to wait.
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Of course you will always have some sort of debt. But 30,000 is a lot. I would not even think of having a child unless the debt was below 10,000, or preferably 5,000.
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